When I was in high school, I was a real fashion hound. As I graduated from college, married and became a mother, my wardrobe became less and less a concern to me. However, in transitioning my wardrobe to skirts, I certainly did not want to look frumpy. Frumpy is not feminine and it is not flattering.
I am acutely aware, however, that I am now in my forties. As I read in French Women Don't Get Fat, it's ridiculous for aging women to try to keep up with the latest styles and trends. Classic looks, with your own body type in mind, are the name of the game. A few well chosen accessories should round out your outfits, although I've never been much of an accessories girl.
The first order of business I tackled when I changed my wardrobe was, obviously, the skirts. My usual tactic of finding clothes at Goodwill didn't prove to be nearly as fruitful in the skirt category. If I'd had been into the late eighties/early nineties pencil skirt look, I wouldn't have had a problem. Mini skirts can also be found in abundance at thrift stores, but not only are those skirts immodest, they just plain don't look good on a woman my age (especially one with varicose veins--thank you, Grandma Dorothy).
Occasionally, I do find skirts that are long enough with a more flattering A-line silhouette at thrift stores. Whenever the girls and I go thrifting, we always check the skirt racks, just in case. We have found some really nice things and when we do, we snap them up.
The girls and I have found buying skirts from retail stores to be more reliable. Some of our favorite places are Christopher and Banks, Style J and occasionally Land's End (although their skirts are getting shorter all of the time). We have had success with finding modest swimming suits through Land's End. I've also heard that Down East Basics and Shabby Apple are good places to find stylish, yet modest clothing.
Once we have our skirts, we build the rest of our wardrobes from thrift stores and garage sales. I'd rather have a nice shirt from Nordstrom, L.L Bean or The Loft purchased from Goodwill than some cheaply made item from Walmart.
My girls have faced yet another problem with skirt wearing. They want to look current in their clothes, not old fashioned. They do want to be more cutting edge than their mother, which is understandable. However, walking the line between modesty and fashion forward is difficult. Again, Daddy has the final say at our house. Elizabeth and Grace have their own styles. Each girl knows what looks flattering on her body type and they're getting to the point where they rarely need my advice when putting together outfits.
As far as making tops modest, we've found our best solution in wearing men's tank undershirts underneath our tops. Even for older women, most of the tops these days bear too much cleavage for our family's tastes. I buy the men's undershirts in one size smaller than what we normally wear. These solve the issue of low necklines as well as short hemlines. There are also some great camis on the market that we've found to be helpful, especially for nicer outfits.
Hollywood Fashion Tape is used regularly at our house to seal up gaps in blouses. I had no idea this stuff even existed until I inherited some from Matt's grandmother. It's awesome.
Pregnancy has added another twist to my skirt wearing journey. Most of the maternity skirts available now are mini skirts. There are maternity maxi skirts on the market, but I'm just not that trendy. I'm also not into the way knit fabrics show every well-earned flaw on my body.
My solution to this maternity dilemma came by way of my daughter, Grace. I grabbed an old pair of maternity jeans from our basement, a pair that I found to be comfortable and flattering (as far as that can go, at my age). Anyway, Grace ripped the jeans apart, added some denim and transformed them into a skirt. She then dyed the skirt (the jeans were the kind with the bleached out parts that bring emphasis to all the wrong places) in a dark denim dye. I also had Grace make the skirt extra long so as to cover a couple of nasty varicose veins (thank you, Grandma Dorothy). I have ordered two other maternity skirts (one from Deborah and Co. and one from New Creation Apparel), but I wear the skirt Grace gave me the most as it has a pocket for my cell phone.
Last year when I went to Texas for the Wisdom House conference, we studied the theme of clothing in the Bible. The conference focused on adorning the spirit, but Mrs. Mouser did discuss the clothing we wear on our bodies as well. She said that we don't need to dress like the folk in Little House on the Prairie in order to be modest. However, she said, there is a dearth of modest clothing available in our times. She suggested that we need godly women with an eye for fashion to begin designing modest clothing for the modern woman. I agree.
As a side note, I have been encouraged by what I'm seeing in the homeschooling community in the way of modest dress. The young women are wearing cute maxi dresses (pulled up high to avoid cleavage bearing) with open front shrugs (to cover the back and shoulders), chunky jewelry and wedge shoes. Very fashion forward, yet still modest.
The Lord did give women a desire to adorn themselves. Of course, as with any God-given desire, this can become idolatry. However, our family, as well as many others, have discovered that we don't have to cow tow to the culture's ideas of fashion in order to be fashionable, yet God-honoring women.
*I also wanted to make a note that in our family we don't adhere to skirt wearing to the degree that it interferes with our lives. Sometimes, it's just easier (and more modest) to wear jeans instead of a skirt. When we go to the farm, ride bikes, ride horses, or work in the yard, we don't wear skirts. When we walk or run for exercise, we wear comfortable work out clothes. When I volunteer in the children's program at BSF, I've found I'm better off wearing jeans as I'm down on the floor with the kids a lot. I know that at one point in history, women wearing pants was considered scandalous. I'm glad I'm not a woman living in that era.
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